Dust it off, and Brush off your shoulders

Song Of The Day- Edwin McCain - I'll Be
Currently Feeling- Nostalgic


Now we have reached the point where there is only 2 weeks left in school, and it only seems fitting to look back and reflect upon myself and other ruminations that have gone on in my head. It's weird, it seems like years ago, when we were at Cactus, eating at the circular table, going through the same routine day in and day out. I always feel nostalgic about it, because for me those were some good times. But times change and the I must the present, although a lot more difficult, has it's kicks too.

Ok so lets start with how much people would believe me 2 years ago or even one year ago that I would be considerable good friends with Paul? God that whole thing in high school seemed so trivial now that when i look at it now, i would have had a lot more fun if that grudge had never existed.

Unfortunately i can not say that every friendship has been improved from the days of yore. Another question could be asked of how many of you would believe that Tawni and me dont talk more than half of what we used to 2 years or even one year ago? For me, that is one of a few things that i deeply regret changing. It's not to say that we are no longer friends, I truly believe that if i really needed her, she would be there for me, much like i would always be there for her. But what has changed is i guess the lines of communication. Don't ask me how it happened but it did. And despite numerous attempts to revert things to the way they were, I've come to realize that if they do, it will happen naturally, and for that I have taken the stance that i will act with her how i would normally act with her back in the day and that is all i can do. And if things returned to normal, that's great, and if not I'll be saddened but a friendship will always be better than none.

Another Ying/Yang effect can also be noticed between Jason and Steph. I remember in high school after finding out about Jasons decision to go to the Air Force academy, there were a lot of concerns about friendships with him. I mean so far away, and were all starting a fresh new chapter in our lives that who knows what was going to change. Luckily we still keep in good contact and seem pretty aware on what's going on in each others lives (at least when I blog). Nonetheless it's not quite the same as having Jason here, cuz he is my bro, someone i could depend on to talk to and take advice from.

My friendship with Steph has gotten stronger on the fact that i think we both know where we are coming from and understand each other. Our goals in school are very similar and she's always there to push me to be more assertive. lol....and it was obvious and still is how much she misses jason and that connection has strengthened our friendship as well. She's someone I know will always give it to me straight, a rarity sometimes in a friendship.

One of the more surprising friendship...or shall i say friendships that i have formed have been between the group i've aptly deemed "the girls". It's crazy because looking back on my blog their old nickname was "the dream team" due to their vastly superior intelligence. Each of them are very unique and refreshing to hang out with. There is Sarah, who is the reasonable one in the group. She is the only one in the group who knows what i'm talking about when i begin rambling about some weird knowledge. I'm always surprised because i think that no one knows what the fuck i'm talking about and Sarah will chime in with some info that corralates to what i just said. Clarice appears to be the badass in the group although once u know her, there lies a more sensitive side to her. I always enjoy having conversations with her on the way to my indiv class because it's always something different. As i speak i'm even brushing off my bow and arrows, and well as tightening up my diaper to once again play the role of Cupid (at least a supporting character). Her ability to show no fear impresses me enormously and backs up her status as a badass (at least in my book). Michelle i would deem the goofy one. She always has the most interesting (and sometimes random) things to say. It's rather enjoyable though, especially when she starts and it seems periods no longer have meanings.....lol....i especially enjoy it when im on the phone with her and we'll go from one topic to a completely different topic and i won't realize how we got there. But whenever i do have a phone conversation with her it seems like time flies by uber quick. Finally, last but certainly not least we have 4ft Aditi....lol j/k.....Aditi to me is probably one of the most well rounded people i have ever met. I mean i often find myself wondering what doesn't she do. I mean if it weren't for my sister, i could state with complete confidence that she is the smartest person i know. That would be good enough for most people, but to top it off she's a dancer, and she's an uber fun person to talk to. She's always up for trying new things (like food) which is cool. Also she seems to enjoy stuff that i opt to do though most people would find it a little odd (i.e. going to the graveyard, going to the thinking spot). Although i haven't convinced her to go to the Modern Languages building with me at night. I really believe that Aditi as well as all the other girls will be a very nice catch for any guy and any guy to pick them up i would have to say they are quite lucky.

Frank.....Franklin Fibbs.....Mr. Bato.....lol I've seen his progression as a person as this year has dragged on. School started off extremely rough for him and he fell upon hard times. But something i thought was an extemely nice thing about our "clique" was that we were all there for him to make sure he stayed on the right path. In ways he was extremely to have friends like us...especially me...lol j/k.....but i'm honest when i say that because we never just let him be but we showed him that we all cared and he has shown extreme strides. A big part of that must be because of his new girl Shannon. She has had a very good impact on him and plus it sheds away some of his "i am man" persona. I must say that i am proud of Frank because i think he has found his equilibrium in terms of responsibilities.

Hmmm so i guess since i wrote about everyone else it's only fitting that i also include myself in this tirade.......For me this year has been an eye opener for me in many aspects of the phrase. I've learned that unlike high school i can't just half ass it and get straight A's. Although I may have been a little late to turn up the juice, i know that given the opportunity next semester, i have to keep the eye on the prize. Girls, as much as i hate to say it, I have yet to find take life by the horns and make stuff happen. I know that i have to take the intiative and I hope one day i will. I'm in no rush because if there is one thing that hasn't changed, it's my desire not to just go into meaningless relationship but to get into a relationship where the girl will mean a lot to me and vice versa. Emotionally there have been things that have gotten me down and there have been things (and still are) that have got me really down. As much as i want to take control of the situation, in some cases i can not do anything but rather deal with them if or when they arrive. In school, i've also become very grateful in everything that has been given to me. My parents working so hard, the genes that they supplied me with (they could have distributed it a little more evenly though). One day i hope I can become a parent as selfless and caring as my parents, especially my mom. Although i've taken some of the things that she has done for the family for granted, the time away from home has made me realize such things and one of the new goals that i strive for is the ability to put that much effort into my family one day and give them the same advantages that my mom worked so hard to give my sisters and me.

Well i have a chem lab final tomorrow so i'll cut myself off there and thus ends my end of school tirade.....i hope you enjoyed